HOHOHO! *searches for big sweaty guy in red and big belly* Yo! Uncle Tan! (who did you think I was looking for?)



Nah, I have no Uncle Tan and its the wrong season.



I mean, happy 2009 to be in roughly 45 minutes from now!



Mmm, reminds me of the Christmas post that is very overdue. Like many other things in this year at 11.16 2008. Pfft, at least I return my library books... just a little late.



Okay, so I won't be late for this post. Looking back on 2008, its same-ol'-same-ol' in the sense that every year trumps the last in being somehow better and worse at the same time. So, for 2009, Im gonna make sure that it doesn't take a turn for too much of the worse and more of the better. Then again, it is the mindset ... but think of it, when it drizzles and you're all dressed up, ..



You think, "at least its not pouring."



Then, it pours.



You think, "at least there's no lightning and/or thunder."



Then, lightning and thunder are as compatible as hot chocolate and marshmallows. (I'm hungry now)



You think you gotta be optimistic, you can't let something so small get you down, there are so many unfortunate souls in the world much more, well, unfortunate than you.



You think, "at least there's no tsu-..."



:

:

:



:) See, thinking positive all the time is just stupid. Okayokay fine... what are the odds. Sure, it's some psychological thing that is supposed to work things out for you, if not cushion your fall. All I can say is, if it doesn't work for you, DON'T try it.



Uhhuh. Maybe, all you should do or think... is nothing. Let nature take its course. Wait, duhhh..but what are the odds that there would be people like me who didn't think of this in the first place and got themselves into some psychology mumbo-jumbo?



Its called "having expectations", which we all know doesn't work out most of the time.



Well, at least I learnt something. Anyway, one of the the things I'm gonna be doing in 2009 would be lowering expectations, unfortunately that includes not being optimistic, or pessimistic (typically, its waiting for a bad outcome. expectations)



Mm... why am I feeling that's gonna be difficult? Crap, I broke my new year resolution before the new year started.



Its like trying on all 5 nail polishes and deciding to buy the nail polish remover. You go home and try to open the bottle of pink remover. Even if you follow the instructions, the cap doesn't seem to budge. Then, you feel all insulted when the bottle says "Child-resistant cap".



I still can't believe I wrestled that bottle and it won.



Nothing much to talk about for the past year, I know what happened and you probably do. So, no emotional clap-trap.



OOOOOH IT WAS HORRIBLE I NEED THERAPY! EVERYBODY HATES ME AND I HATE MYSELF!



xD yeah right. Honestly, things can get better are ...



1. How you get smarter

2. How you try to be a better friend, daughter, grown-up, senior, teacher ... you know, with the people in your life

3. How you you learnt all your lesons and things from school, get so much better at things you've done before

4. Journeys on self-discovery

5. Eating new, good foods.

6. Trying new things

7. Earning your own money

8. Shopping with your own money

9. Getting that sexy Marilyn Monroe mole on your face and great hair

10. Strange overall satisfaction at having survived the year and have had some good times


As for things that got worse:

1. Craving for food at unearthly hours

2. Losing more sleep

3. Stumbling so much

4. Feeling like you wasted so much time

5. O levels

6. Being a badder friend even though you didn't mean to. Badder anything

7. Atrocious lateness

8. Getting screwed

9. Being angry that your once-clean face has a blemish thing called a mole

10. Bad bouts and some bad times

Oh well, if anything this list has shown me... Things turn your smile upside down are merely temporary while things that turn your frown inside out (okay nevermind) are for the long term. Achievements, scaling the Mount Everest of junk in your room and cabinet and looking back on how you cleaned up real good... how you became a better person overall.

Now that my friends, is the measure of a good year, and eventually, a good life. I sure became better at cut-throat talk. Looking back at my silly journal entries, I realise how assertive I've become. If you're a writer, words are like photographs and with a voice. Mmmm, who says a picture is a thousand words? Don't exactly care about being polite or nice, more of getting my point across and being as relevant, with a personal touch as much as possible.

Right, back to the topic. If you didn't know and are probably going to be too lazy to read, well I got news for you. A good year is not cos of the events, but how the entire year has shaped you into the person you were meant to be. Of course, it has to go on for your entire life. Oh and, do have fun along the way.

Resolutions. Blah, lose weight? Not for me!

Just some mundane and hugely important things Im gonna try to do, and not be like people who try to lose weight and explode during CNY and find no reason to do it for the whole year throughout. C'mon, you can do better than that.

So I'm going to exercise, sharpen punctuality, sleep well, do my chores, use lotion, manage and record my expenses and floss. Oh and take it all one step higher in whatever I do and grow in church and in God.

See, that's not so hard.. (wait, exercising?!)

Oh, I got a lovely present to start my year right.

Besides a yummy zhu rou zhou for dinner and seafood alfredo and ice cream for lunch...

I received a lovely blue interestingly-covered NIV Bible!! *squeals!* Now I got my own copy of the Word (Capital W!) and its personalised too!

Thank you very much if you're reading this, its beautiful and most practical. LOVE.IT.TTO

Read the part about Noah already and the Great Flood. A rainbow for the promise that God wouldn't wipe us all out in water (yeah who knows what else we can get wiped out by ... haven't got to that part yet). Oh well, the most important lesson this year is that we can't live a second without hope. So look towards that rainbow that you never bothered to find.

Lastly, my message to my readers:

If you're good at something, do us all a favour and put it to use and the best you can to benefit the human race. Who knows, you're the only one who might be able to do it your way and think like you!

Unless, of course, your talent is harsh criticism, keep it objective and until people start breaking down and you're like "Shit. No wonder I have no friends!"

Wow, 11.59 HAPPY ALMOST NEW YEAR.











12AM 2009. HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009!

Labels: NEW YEAR

A whole new lineup for the absence lately.



Does anyone realise everyone's sporting black nails lately? Fingernails, toenails, everywhere I go. Feels as though they're all ready for the Christmas party or doing the anti-Christmas.

Well, not me! I gots SIA-girl red nails ho yeah! (thanks mythili love you for buying it and doing most of it for me cos I'll mess it up). All in the spirit of the holiday season and they'll be off by CNY. Wouldn't want to be labelled as cheena. Anyway, killer red is H-A-W-T. Not just for aunties okay... The right shade makes it classic and eye-catching. (so don't be close-minded)

Mmm, that reminds me, my fingernails are going shiny pink. The anti-black. Love the anti-trend. As soon as I get the top coat. Oh and, for anyone who's thinking of neon pink or hot pink, it's seriously not advisable. It's terribly tacky, like.. like.. tights that hug a bit of the sole. Tights are good, but not THOSE. They scream faux pas. Blinding in a bad way.

Done playing Blackwell.



Updates updates. My patience wavers like Starhub coverage when it comes to my brother. Mrs Aidil is considerably patient and all ... which was how I started out. Nice, forgiving and efficient. Sigh, what can I do. I just can't help twitching when I hear or see an incoherent statement. If you have to hear it all the time... you'll go nuts too. Okay, that's just me.

C'mon. Being invincible doesn't mean "cannot see". As is knewed, noisely, teached, nevermind.

Twitch twitch twitch. An alarm just goes off in my head.

To give him credit, he's learnt fast enough, done better than some p6s and sec4s,uh-huh. He's been patient enough and endured my "NOOOOOOOO!!!! WRONG!!!!"s and he's just a kid. A boy kid. Which gives him a worse attention span.

Oh, he has this ... thing to call it "the whole entire thing" WHY CAN'T HE JUST SAY "THE WHOLE THING" OR "THE ENTIRE THING" WHY!

He watched too much TV, he's moody during studying (understandable and I do give concessions) and he tries to last-minute but fails badly at doing so cos he's freaking tired from watching TV. I don't get it. English is a chore to him, heh it reminds me of the relationship between Chinese and I.

Me: Do your corrections.

Brother: I feel like dying.

Me: No.. that's the easy way out.

Brother: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Okay who is responsible for this. I don't understand, he's treating English like a chore and its forcing me to do it too cos other than making him learn by rote I'm practically at my wits end cos when I do something less boring he would rather not do it and do it "rote".

You know, like how its a must to learn Chinese words by rote cos there are like 10 000 characters and everyone is different. That's why I like English better, there's less routine.

Now, that's why its frustrating.

Okay, moving on.



Ahaha, if you would kindly direct your attention to the tag that advertises Low Kay Hwa novels. I might enjoy reading, but my taste is definitely beyond those. Even the covers look cheesy. Like something churned out of a washed-up Channel 8 drama serial.

Which reminds me...

I was watching Ellen and then channel-flipping. Flip flip flip ... Channel 8.

Me: booooooooring. *proceeds to press flipping button*

Brother: NOOO!! It's Love Blossoms 2!

He's been auntie-fied.

I gotta hit the library. For the books and erm, the fountain of knowledge. Not excited about school though. Never thought I would need a library kaki after exams.

Hehs, I thought Low Kay Hwa was a middle-aged auntie... turns out its some geeky guy in his 20s. Looks so. Heh, Huiyi reads em'! Okay fine, reading tastes are up to discretion. Anyway, she let me read one of those. (Hehe, at least you're reading!) Can't believe how sappy it was! I read a little though.

:P How much pride went down the toilet in the making of those novels? Okay okay, all the teenage girl fans.

I don't know, it's .. it's as gay as Clay Aiken.

Alright, disclaimers. If you're a fan, than that's not my problem. I like Life of Pi, Hairil thinks its a roundabout book. See? We all have our own little erm, mostly-unliked likings. So I'm not gonna judge you on that, cos I got my own too! Aha (at least I don't like cheesy novels!!!!!!!)

Mmm as for my mostly-unliked likings.. wait a sec, I'm not s'posed to talk about this.

Life of Pi is very well-liked though.

Heh heh enough naughtiness.

That with writers too. Well, at least you wrote something. Something painful for me to read though. *shrugs* Take it with a pinch of salt, I know my blog is painful to read to some, but its not to me. Okay okay, at the end of the day... as long as you like it, as long as your teenage female acne-fighting, finger-crossing, wide-eyed-hoping, love-strangling fans worship it (just read the website), fine by me.

The last disclaimer: This is a critique too. I can talk about nails, clothes, pop culture references, guys and remain un-superficial.

Plus, I don't over-love myself. Seen a terrible case of an ego-exploding blog. Take cover, the debris will blind you with its life in self-denial.



Never judge a book by its cover (can't say that about Low Kay Hwa's novels though). A physics teachers in his 50s who wears glasses and a bow tie beat a guy who's got muscles and the looks of Leonardo Dicaprio and Ben Affleck in his 20s at Survivor. Uhhuh. Being pretty won't win you a million dollars but it will win you the affections of Mythili. :)



My last report of this post: Self-denial is bad for health. Humans. We just want to be something we're not. Of course, this holds true for everyone and is sadly exaggerated for some members of our community.

Societal expectations, what mama always wanted you to be, the grass is always greener on the other side, low self-esteem, forgivable to some extent.

Or, if you can't beat them, join them.

Hahs, but every once in a while, you'll be annoyed. *winks* Love ya Fatimah.

Labels: advertisement, Answers, Family, Fashion, Friends, Quirks, Real Life

Darn, as the days go by, I'm starting to feel a little duller each day. Repetition is not good for the soul after a long while. P3/4 English, Neopets, the occasional emo moment, the not-so-occasional fun, nothing else... damn...

Alright, time for a serious post for mental stimulation. (Heh, at least I don't turn to...)

Darn, it's been a depressing year 'innit'. Well for most of us that is.

Mmmhmm. That is if you've read the SATURDAY section of ST.

What can I say, shit happens. Exciting, depressing shit. Kinda makes me think of people who would rather not read the papers or keep informed just so they don't let too much sympathy, apathy and/or the plight of the world rest on someone else's shoulders with nothing that they can't do about it.

Well, stimulate your mind. Be it escapism or a case of 'what's new anyway', it kinda seems as though news is not so new after all. Riots, cross-border spat, the economy being in the toilet, the Parliament being inhabited by clowns, drinking plastic milk... damn we're a screwed up world.

Anyway, I guess the only thing really keeping me reading the news is the reading bug, having nothing else to do, needing to get distracted by things I have to do and plain curiosity.

I s'pose... in the next post, I shall update on the 2008 year.

Labels: Answers

Never know how much I love you
Never know how much I care
When you put your arms around me
I give you fever that's so hard to bear

You give me fever
When you kiss me fever when you hold me tight
Fever in the morning
Fever all through the night

Sun lights up the daytime
Moon lights up the night
I light up when you call my name
And you know I'm gonna treat you right

You give me fever
When you kiss me
Fever when you hold me tight
Fever in the the morning
Fever all through the night.

Everybody's got the fever
That is something you all know
Fever isn't such a new thing
Fever started long ago.

Romeo loved Juliet
Juliet she felt the same
When he put his arms around her
He said "Julie baby you're my flame"

Thou givest fever
When we kisseth
Fever with thy flaming youth
Fever - I'm afire
Fever yea I burn forsooth.

Captain Smith and Pocahontas
Had a very mad affair
When her Daddy tried to kill him
She said "Daddy-O don't you dare"

Give me fever - with his kisses
Fever when he holds me tight
Fever - I'm his Missus,
Oh daddy won't you treat him right.

Now you've listened to my story
Here's the point I have made:
Chicks were born to give you fever
Be it Fahrenheit or Centigrade

They give you fever -
When you kiss them
Fever if you live and learn
Fever - till you sizzle
What a lovely way to burn.

What a lovely way to burn.
What a lovely way to burn.


Fever (1956) - Peggy Lee version (Credits Eddie Cooley and Otis Blackwell)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGb5IweiYG8

Freaking sexy song. *Girls in da room do cat purr* Check it out, seriously xD

Mmmm, definitely a classic, naughtay way to describe love.

Labels: Music

Houston, we have a problem.


Haha, did you watch this cartoon... astronaut says that line and people at the control station are like: Always problem, problem, problem. Don't you ever call to say hi?!

(NASA is in Houston btw)


This is to all my friends with problems with your daddies and/or mummies:

(okay forget that, sounds wannabe. its like: this is out to all my girls who suffered a broken heart. let's annihilate the XYs once and for all)


Anyway, back to the point, parents are parents. They read your blog and get mad about it, they accuse you of the most ridiculous ... accusations, they are really prickly when it comes to bedtime, they lied when they said after O levels can stay up all you want, they are terrible drivers, they emotionally scar and traumatise you, ....



and they think it's okay.


Damn did I make it worse? Alright, damage control.

With a bit of Jun Hong's 4 points ...

1. S'pore is small, therefore competitive. Kiasu parents.

2. Different era. Parents more protective cos they don't want you to suffer like they did.

3. Different era. They don't understand you and vice versa cos they were brought up differently.

4. (Sorry I can't remb the 4th one...i'll make this one up) They are parents.


Well, I won't be of much help since I don't know how to help myself much on this one.

1.Talk to them and 2. do whatchu gotta do.


Well, think of this, I'm very sure, one day.. many many years from now... you'll be telling yo'mama:

Look ma! Top the world!


Over and out (okay that line is just... cya later, alligator. lame and acting cool)

Labels: Answers, Pondering

Hello, I am Constance. I shall write a fun ad for me.

I'm looking for a job, and if you need a tutor for English, and are willing to pay a reasonable price, your search ends here! *corny music*

Okay, whatever. I can tutor both spoken and written English. However, I won't know everything, c'mon, I'm only just done with my O's. Give me a chance and I'll check things out for you, meaning I'll study it myself first, then apply my knowledge, then explain it in a relevant manner. Will tailor to needs of tutee (funny word).

Preferably Primary School, gotta put some years in between, cos nobody's that good in something they've only learnt for say 2 years, as compared to 9 years.

Patient, firm, not too demanding (that never works), reasonable, fun and gets the job done.

Hmm... You'll be closer to perfect pronounciation of: She sells seashells by the seashore.

Oh, and you'll get a better grasp of grammar and the basics. Of course, some materials will be provided. A little bit of vocab and skills too.

Of course, tutee has to be cooperative. Tutoring rates and times can be negotiated. Contact: lim_constance@hotmail.com



(that's my official, business-y email address, you know, one that people can easily remember and take seriously)

Labels: advertisement

I'm very tired, but very satisfied.

Somebody please nag me, force me, pull me along to get my lazy ass off anything that is comfortable and into a swimming pool. Hate the running track. Bleargh. Bite me.

Which reminds me, have yet to learn to cycle. Did you know that cycling causes.... nevermind.

Or, you can pay me to clean your house.

One whole day of candy, junk food and fizzy drinks makes me really sick. Ughh, never want to see another chocolate, candy, ice cream, pepsi, sprite, whatever for another week. Or KFC and pizza.

Well, walked it off at the fabulous new Jurong Point and did minimal vacuuming and window cleaning. Still feel flabby though. It's time I started doing a bit of exercise everyday.

Let's see, headed over to HuiJuan's love-rly new house! Mmm, housewarming, chatting, laughing, pigging out, getting lost and watching Survivor and Just for Laughs.

Oh, and did I mention our good friend Mr Ng was there? :) Wonder why he wasn't there yesterday with the other CO girls. Anyway, no matter how strange it is, still is nice to see him again. For those of you still in school, don't look at me like that. I miss my teachers, it's not my fault I finished O levels.

HEHE.

Anyway, we all do miss each other. Big love. Of course, I won't miss some things and some people, I mean erm, some things. Big smiles.

Exploded with fun. Darn, I should always watch Survivor with the correct people. Snide remarks, laughing at stupidity and cheering for half naked guys that look hot from different angles (that's just Mythili) and physics teachers rooting for 57 year old physics teachers.

Lovely. The Bob guy looks like this nerdy ol' skinny guy wearing a bow tie, and he wins all 4 challenges. Ah, where is the world coming to?

Apparently, professional gamers aren't as pro as physics teachers when it comes to tricking each other. Don't underestimate them ya'll.

I like the Bob guy. He defies the odds, though I wish he would stop the stereotypical look of stuffy teachers. Pretend that your physics teacher rocking more than Olympic champions, pin-up models and professional gamers in Survivor challenges.

Anyway, we all caught up with each other. Of course, after a lot of walking, getting lost, confusing directions, screaming and head-smacking and "why didn't you just tell me your block was red, white and yellow?!!".

Then, we headed over to revamped JP. Now it kicks the ass of all the other malls. It's beeeeeautiful. Ooh and the shoes. SHOES! Of course, lovely shops. A little too tired to relate what happened there, gotta see it for yourself. Ran into Alvin at JP. Not exactly, ran, but oh well. So i see yo' sister's all grown up.

A shop called Skinfood? Yum! Won't be reviewing the shops today I guess.

Planned out my next week already and so far, this has been the slackiest week, but a welcome change from the last.

Plus, I have a tutoring job now. With my brother.

It's a lot more acrobatics than you think okay. 10 dollars for 2 hours? I have to relearn my grammar rules (it's one thing about knowing your English, and another thing about STUDYING english, then teaching it), make it relevant to the brother, and explain it in a primary school manner. Uhhuh, well I am proud of myself of figuring some things out. Go corny! Haven't lost it yet.

When my brother gets all hyper or emo (I swear he acts like he's on his period), that's the worse part.

mmmm, did I mention mua got a part in a video for Stephanie's (K's) client? Yeah baby, 80 dollars at the end of the day! the 4 out of 15 that wuz chosen! Ho yeah! All black. Gotta love being paid to act! Getting paid to do something you like is definitely better than getting screwed by what you sign and a job agency and standing at the cashier getting yelled at by customers and managers. I'd rather have the director yell at me.

Week 1 was full of Stephanie and eventful. Many firsts and celebrations, and getting things done.

Week 2 was full of job hunting, sleepover and slacking.

Week 3 was full of cashiering, going to Fairprice and quitting. Lovely.

Week 4 was full of slacking, going out and tutoring. Real money after so long, and I did get some things done. And a new arrival.

Time flies. It's been 4 weeks already?! Awwwwwww.... Doing whatever you want, doing whatever it takes to earn money, doing whatever it takes to get out of trouble... ahhh... in fact, the only thing I haven't done is prob just altering my new jeans, exercise and spend money on clothes (my own money). Of course, hanging out with some wonderful people, which I have to do more than once. A pretty green top and black jeans.

Next week would be just as eventful. As promised. For now, I have to get rid of my streak of slight insomnia. Any suggestions? Preferably not warm milk, it makes me sick. No medicine, cos I hate it and it feels like artificial sleep.

Labels: What's up or new, WhatcausesJoy

This post will be all about Anjelica. Why?

From a quiz eons ago, Anj was tagged. Goes like this:

http://www.oreocookie-sucker.blogspot.com/

Yeah she's the oreo cookie sucker, guru of all horniness, cat eyes, rugrat, corrupting everyone she meets. Otherwise, pure evil. (Ho yeah) Grovel at her evil feet.

It all started some time ago. Ah, EL remember the times we weren't as corrupted in the mind? Wait, it's all coming back to me.

"Hello my name is Anjelica." (she says to us)

"Oooh you mean like Rugrats?" (the mean kid on Rugrats that bullies the babies is called Angelica if you didn't know)

"Oh. yeah. Rugrats."

"I'll call you Rugrats then. Rugrats rugrats rugrats" (my annoying habit of naming people I just met is getting worse these days)

"So you're Anjelica. Are you angelic?" (I'm too nice)




Today we all know better.


Okay I shall first give her credit for saying nice things about me. Thank you :) And I'm honoured to be thought of like that. Love you too Scarlie, and so says the rest of us.

Ah the adventures of Scarlet (yeah she picked the name from the camp. toldcha she was horny) and Tiffany, 2 confused blondes who fight over undesirable guys (to some extent), the shortest skirts, makeup and botox, and who's the smarterest of course.

It all started when...

Corny: Okay, so to know how bimbos think, we have to think like them. Do you want to be the smart blonde, or the dumb blonde?

Anj: Oooh oooh I pick the dumb blonde! Wait, there's no such thing as a smart blonde!

Corny: Glad you got that far.




Movin on, I thought we played out the scene if we were enemies. We'll pull each other's hair and scream blondely.



You have a crush on a cartoon. How sweet. All your fantasies must be in 2-D.

Ah, the things that make Anjelica the horny cat-eyed girl that we have all come to know, love and say "EEEEW!!!"

7. Characteristic i hate about myself?
- I happen to like myself a lot.

When it happens, it's quite amusing to watch.

8. For the person you hate you say?
- Sorry, whatever remarks I have for you is too much for your brain capacity to handle.

*sob sob* So on the same page with us when we insult.

6. Characteristic I like about myself?
- Humourous?

Lay on the horny jokes.

19. Who is the sexiest among the 10 people?
- ME

For posterity's sake: It's good to live in denial.

29. Where does number 1 lives?
- Not sure but she stops at lakeside MRT.

Yeah, I can't let you know where I live. Who knows what might happen on my way home?

28. Who does number 1 admire?
- She worships me.

Anjelica, when you read this, you are so dead. After I froth at the mouth, die and rise from the dead as a zombie to drag you down with me.


Sidenote: No offence if you're blonde, or if you're dyed blonde. If it's not your colour, then you got screwed.

Labels: remember the gooooood times

At 11plus, you would probably be popped out in 3 hours.

12.18 Woke up from headache.

------------------------- considerably peaceful sleep -----------------------------

10am Woke up and read sms from 7plus in the morning.

10plusam Lovely surprise in an email.




To Ginger, should you ever learn to read (well, duh) and learn your ABCs, I hope you'll get to read this too. Don't worry, it's simple to read, I promise. :)

You're definitely the loveliest littlest thing ever. You looked so small, tiny, next to the love from which you came. Everything was so much bigger than you.

You know what?*

If you are as long as my palms in a line, you must be one of the smallest humans among us. Would it seem as though everything's too big or too high?

From the day that you came to be, you'll always be loved. If you asked me, I would probably say "I do".

Maybe, it is the world that is too big and too high. It is easy to get lost in it, but as long as you have a map, you'll be fine. How could anyone do anyting bad to you?

You seem rather delicate too, with tiny newly crafted fingers. Can't let anyone drop you now, can we? Looks like I can't even hug you or touch your nose because you might cry and it would be as though I used too much force.

You're ruddy all over, a most healthy and rosy glow of red.

You still seem a little wet from coming out. Oops.

If they said a baby looks like a little old person, well they're not that wrong. Don't take offence, you are only a rough sketch of what you can become. Some folds on your skin here and there.

The hairs on your head are black, curly and Indian. Wispy strands among thicker strands, awwww... just like yo' mama.

What an interesting nose you have. I'm resisting an urge to poke it.

We only see most of your upper lip. Who knows what you have to say, when you seem to be keeping a stiff upper lip?

All swaddled in a blanket, when you opened your eyes and yawned, I become more convinced of innocence that prevails in all of us, just locked away deep down. My, only a few hours old and you're doing great things already,

Ah, who knows what you would make out of this world? Who would you choose to become?

When you're 16, I'll be 32. Aww, darn, you make me feel old.

And yo'mama. A woman is definitely most beautiful after she's experienced erm, the miracle. Be sure to tell her that.

In your ultrasound scan, you looked just like a blob of molten ginger. Therefore, until and after they decide your name, you'll be known as Ginger to me.

Happy Birthday to you Ginger.

Literally.




*Hafizah is a bad influence! Meanie!

Labels: To be a Child

1.16 AM I'm still awake and darn my 2006,2007,2008 November resolution for sleeping early and rising with the MRT. And who on earth craves for KFC chicken (except for Hairil). Alright, besides getting strange cravings, and erm, at unearthly hours (like a sudden urge for carbohydrates, preferably in potato or tapioca form), nothing is up.



Btw, my strangest craving yet is for tapioca. Good solid tapioca with things that get stuck to your teeth cooked in a big pot with some salt and to make it all slippery in your mouth. The smell is one of a kind, as is the texture and taste, potato-like, but with more kick. Sweeter, but not too sweet. Chewy, but doesn't make your mouth all dried up like sweet potato. Got so addicted I was lolling off my seat the next day and relating my craving to a new friend I've only met for 2 hours.



1.23 AM These few days have been enlightening and frustrating. It's a good thing I learnt things the hard way before I really get slapped in the face and there's no law to protect fully matured adults.



Frustrating:



Sigh, feeling the stress of the working world (drama, but yes) and how money being able to pay for my desired material possessions and me being in control of it makes me relish it and run after it like a donkey led by a tantalising carrot stick that is always a few cm away from me but never in my mouth.



Enlightening:



After 2 days of lolling off over being jobless, realisation hits me that allt he material posessions I've always wanted and the power that came along with it couldn't replace my essential needs. I'd rather be a slave to time needed to be spent with people generally referred to as loved ones (and taken for granted ...) than to the driving force of all that is capitalism. Oh monay, it's a cold cruel world out there.



Frustrating:



On Day 1 of cashier training, I was subjected to more propaganda. You can smell it from mile away. Do part-timers really give a damn about the companies they work for? Doubt it. Sharon was lolling off from boredom and I was resisting.



Enlightening:



Learnt more about customer service (and ignored all the Fairprice propaganda), made new friends (who were lolling off in boredom too), studied patterns of companies and competitors (sorry Fairprice, I like Cold Storage a lot better, though they have a corny ad on tv).



Frustrating:



Day 2 of cashiering: Very taxing on the patience. Sharon doing a lot of stress control and making herself more stressed, and I catch the debris falling from the stress-hijacked Sharon. Ouch. She goes left-right-left-right and has not yet done a nose-dive into a decision.



Enlightening:



Confident of being a cashier and passing the test. Optimism on a high. Was ready to face anything and anticipating paycheck. Then, all cranky cos I realised there was so much to study and I wasn't ready. And suddenly, making the cash register spring out wasn't as amusing as the first few times.



Frustrating:



Day 3 Didn't have enough time to memorise the new info on how to work EPOS. (tinier machine for paying by cashcard, NETS blah). Aced theory test and did badly for practical. Didn't answer one question and panicked (re-enactment of SPAs, which I do need to help myself asap) real bad. Rejected receipts same no. as accepted receipts. Questioning ability as cashier.



Enlightening:



Freaked out over the fact that I could've been blacklisted by the group of employment agencies. Punked by unprofessional consultant. Resolved to quit (Fairprice cashiering and Equator) in a phone call. Tamed all hell that broke loose.



Discovered amazing innate ability to talk diplomatically out of any situation and sounding sincere and interested. Thank you God for giving me this talent. Though I might suck at many other things (everything except reading, writing, the like), it's an indispensable skill that happens to come naturally to Corny.



Thank you 8 years of drama training and experience. You have served me well.



Thank you annoying, demanding, unreasonable, stifling certain teachers of JSS. For when I had to talk to you in a nice, respectable manner (and perhaps you don't know that as much as you tolerate us kids, a lot of students are resolved to tolerating your shit too until we graduate), you really trained me in dealing with people who push you around, don't understand your situation, insist on wanting things their way and not seeing how unfeasible your "requests" are, quite firm in wanting to stifle any form of creative thinking (or politically incorrect thinking), gee, I don't know.



I gritted my teeth, I held back my little angry voice telling me to walk away or lose it. I slid a sarcastic buttered remark, for it is what you wanted to hear. And today, I'm stronger.



Frustrating:



2 days later (today), I still have to make a trip down to Tanjong Pagar. Waste ez-link card money. (Wei! recession hor!).



Enlightening:



Learnt the lesson of diplomacy, severity of black and white, and professionalism. And if you can help it, be sure to ensure that people paying you are professional. I learn from others' mistakes. Settled "debt" with agency and happy.



Frustrating:



The price to pay for fame and recognition is a pain in the ass. Damn you pussycat dolls.



When I grow up, I wanna be in famous I wanna be in movies ... *continues computer-generated twittish featherbrained lyrical content and voices mashed together digitally attempting to be passed off as singing* Damn, PCD sounds even more nasal than Britney.



Be careful of what you wish for cos you just might get it?



Yeah, sure. Strippers who for some reason never take off their clothes would never tell you that fame comes with people ready to smear your reputation and it's almost impossible to remain inconspicous. Ah public scrutiny, gotta love it.



And if you wanna take it in a candy-coated jingle...



"You can talk about me. Cos Ima hawt topic!"



Yeah yeah, with fame comes groupies and/or boobies (what can money not afford to have?)



Enlightening:



Let me get back to you on that.



2AM Frustrating: Blog-hopping on respectable blogs (cheem, reflective, interesting, intelligently funny), and little unknown blogs (some of which deserve to be forever tucked into cyberspace unrecognised cos it would blind people with sanity), darn are teens that shallow? Literary merit isn't much of a winner too ay, me hearties.



Sigh, it would be the end of the world if adults start assuming all teens write like that. Manufactured, bubblegum, dishing up emo-ness and love stories and pigeonholed (cos it all looks the same?), no writing style, bumbling about everyday life in an uninteresting manner, zilianing pics (there is a limit you know), and of course, the occasional, or everyday potty-mouth word. :) Fish! (HAHA my little cousin really thought this was the 'F' word, so adorable.)



Enlightenment:



I didn't post due to lack of inspiration, which makes dry and blah blog posts. And I realised that I don't need essentially need pictures in my blog cos my writing is what matters. Haven't found anyone with a similar style (like churning out long posts) of writing, perspective, humour (I'm not funny, never was, never will be), awareness (mmm that depends).



Read my long long posts if u want to. And pictures don't always show up cos I'm just different. I'm a writer, not an photoshopper, photographer or picture-perfect model.



Yes and I'm amused by my emo moments during blogging, cos it sure is nicer to read than ..



"sianxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxz. will someone ever rescue me from this pit of botomless doom? where's my prince charming when he promise he will come? reversations of the past coming back to me. why did you lie to me? my fantasy is gone. wanna see my slashed wrist?"



Ah darlings, how many mistakes can you pick out?



1) Understandably, we are SGrean, and the use of the term "sian" isn't a crime really. But repeated 's's and 'z's are reminiscent of the twit wave that used to engulf the blogosphere a few years back, it's horrible, hideous and unspeakable like like.. 70s tackiness or an unflattering purple CD cover that says "ELTON JOHN EXTRAVAGANZA".









The horror.



2) glaring grammatical errors that put off respectable readers, and it happens throughout the entire post.



3) ima stickler for good spelling. (and i NEVER had to study for spelling after p3! HAHAHA!!)



4) SVA problem. Ouch.



5) Over-indulgence in childish fantasies that take common sense to realise that it's not true, and that the blogger has been living in delusion.



6) Typical emo-ness that gets really boring. Man eat man, learn that and when it happens to you, try to describe it in another way and just say "Damn I've been screwed real bad." Everyone gets it immediately.



7) Wrist slashing is so passe. Try mentally torturing yourself. Or maybe it's cos you don't have much of a brain to be tortured with haha!



Okayokay, chill. Understandably some people just like physical pain and all (i don't, cos mental pain already gets me lolling off *wooo!*), still, it all seems rather frivolous. I'll get back to you when you check out that word. Honestly, some emo-ness is just plain... frivolous.



And never use big words that you don't know how to use appropriately, it makes you a laughing stock and unnecessarily taxes your brains and theirs.



"I HATE YOU! I HATE MY FAMILY! I HATE MY SO-AND-SO FOR MAKING ME LOVE YOU SO MUCH! (miley cyrus, you are a bad example)"



1) Ah a bit of anger and teen angst. Nobody understands you. (Darn we do take that for granted)



"NOW IM RUNNING AWAY FROM HOME AND LOOK! IM POPPING ECSTASY WITH A MARLBORO'S IN MY MOUTH AND OOOPS! I SWALLOWED MY CIGGY!"



2) Plain dramatic stupidity and a cry for attention of which shrinks should promptly attend to. Ah, the wild life, out all night, not caring if your "abusive" parents worry the shit out of themselves cos you don't come home, you not worrying that your parents seem apathetic to your antics...



"she slept with him, what a ho. i hope they get STDs together, watch out arh, next time you bathe, you see something funny on your .."



3) Won't finish that sentence. haha, nothing like a bit of spite!



Last and not least, the icing on the teenage cake:



"Fish You!"





















Not to mention overtly long pauses to show depth in thought or anticipation. mmm, so don't use it unnecessarily.



2.30AM End of a fantastic blog post (I love myself too much, someone restrain me!) and a boring day. What time shall I wake up tomorrow?

Labels: Accomplishments, Answers, Quirks, Real Life, Seeds of Smartness Sown to Show-off, WhatcausesJoy

identity-finder, half-thinker, thought-translater, life-pacer, adversary-fighter, grown-wiser, subtle-humour, nail-biter, indulgent-appreciator, pragmatic-dreamer, irony-murdered, unglamourous-puss, rocket-bunny

october 1st, sixteen, libran, singapore, tutor, christian, student, daughter, sister, friend, writer, artist, teenager, life, love

corny in a paradigm where sense and non sequiturs go together, taking it in like vanilla ice cream on a banana split, or sand on a boot. whichever goes.

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