Today was my off day with just lots of time to slack at home.
What I did:1) Headed over to Steph's to kiap some brekkie and say goodbye.
2) Watched Food Lover's Guide to the Planet. Yum! Go young, new-age French chefs. Expensive gourmet though... I shall live it up in my fantasy or until I get a sponsor.
3) Read Nat Geo mag about Neanderthals
(some of which I know) and pretty turqoise chested bee-eaters.
4) Read TODAY. No President has ever been as curious as Obama as been.
You have to go through a series of tests and produce evidence for everything you've done in your entire career to be top dog in his admin.
The funny shit was the caption and the cartoon. The dude in the picture does the survey and the speech bubble says: I don't know Joe the Plumber!5) Knocked out for 2 plus hours from drowsiness.
6) Added and customised my Cbox!
7) Chatted, played Neopets (while the novelty lasts), uploaded pictures to com and photobucket.
8) Folded the clothes and I did it better than my mama
(on my to-do list to be helpful around the house)9) Organised my textbooks, assessments and TYSes from Sec 3 and 4. Threw out all dusty shit that never made sense.
Sadly, I'm not done yet. Sigh, when, oh when will I be done. I hate cleaning things out. So much dust. Tsk! I swear that's the best excuse for a maid.
I have yet to organise it more thoroughly and wipe the bookshelves, then put back what I want, then put the rest in the storeroom. The papers go out to the karang guni.
Helpful mummy did the rest after I was too tired. Gosh, where the hell does she get her energy from, she just organised my brother's school things.
Had a yummy homecooked dinner. 2 failed attempts at making sausages today. Lunch was exam-style. Lazy to cook, lazy to eat. White rice to fill me up. Pulverised some ants, disgusting insects. Do them in with some spray. Watch them wriggle, pulse and ... stop moving. What a glorious sight.
Other than the fact that I have to do cleaning (I'd rather do the dishes), today's a relaxing day. Oh yeah. Nothing too pressing on my mind besides all the dust I have to clean out.
Well, for the more emotional part (it's just me), I get all angsty, angry, frustrated at everything like I'm on one of those days. I speak fast, my heart beats with the stress in my head, I'm snappy, extremely impatient, torn up and all I wanna do is kill some people I don't like.
Oh my.
I suppose it's partly due to my mother's nagging. Now ya'll see why I don't find Mr Lim all that naggy. I got the worst hand.
I hate it when my mama acts like a know-it-all. Of course I know that I don't know my results yet and if I'm going to retake, she just makes it sound like I'm ignorant and NOT LISTENING TO HER. LISTEN WOMAN, THE MORE YOU TELL ME, THE MORE I'M LIKELY TO IGNORE YOU.
Okay drama-mama moment.
She doesn't want me to throw out my things, she wants me to reorganise painstakingly like the past few years of my life, she's acting like gee, for my next exam or working life, I have to write another SEQ essay. What are the odds of that? AND, I can start from scratch. esp if I'm unlikely to rummage through more dust.
I hate dust. I love vacuum cleaners.
And its also partly cos I'm haunted by the future and the past, how infuriating it all was. People don't know how to handle my academic weaknesses and I just get trapped in the terrible never-ending cycle.
No worries. I'll handle whatever comes, and overcome it.
What I want is just a fresh start.
So many dead trees from wasted paper.
It's only a waste if students don't do the work that teachers print for them right?
Not the fact that the teachers care about us enough to give us practice when we need it, right?
You know what?
Why are we given so much holiday homework? I can't remember a single holiday that was a holiday. Such is our society.
We know you care about us and the trees, yes Mr Lim (and Mdm Rani hehe. Huiyi totally hugged a tree), but if u give us so much, we can't finish it cos we're all not the pros or the elite, or just plain muggers (crazy shit), even if we want to, the stress just piles up and it drives us away.
Eventually, it works against you. Students don't care because they feel so pressurised they turn off, and the trees die because of students, and it's our faults. Another expectation to live up to. Hooray.
We love ya'll, we don't care how you're brought up cos we got our fair share of shit too. I do appreciate the work teachers do (have a post on this), but times have changed, move on with the times and different circumstances. And I love trees, mind you.
Well, maybe it's just me alone that's like that.
You can treat me as an isolated case who wants to do well and fit it to the fabric of success.
Pent-up emotions are still with me. Awwwww... gotta find some way to release em'.
At least I'm not living in Seoul, sitting for their CSAT. Life's much worse over there. Poor kids. So much for the Asian models. I do wish to see a shift in attitudes.
:)
Like the bit of wisdom imparted to me today:
God gave us contentment in living, not disappointment in trying to live it up. Life's worth should not be priced with anything except life itself.Just depends on how someone defines life. We all accept simple pleasures deep down though.
My, I tend to get emotional. Time to find a counsellor. A professional one, mind you. Non-professionals haven't been all that successful with me.
Labels: Family, Teen Angst, What's up or new, WhatcausesJoy
