Monday, June 15, 2009

Where have I been? Good question.

With my Lord, of course.

Will update on church camp after a many a sleeping hour, for now, I'll content myself looking at my wallpaper - a picture from camp, taken by John. Jasmine's so bubbly, it looks as if her cheeks are stuffed with pistachios (kai xin guo) and Samuel's looking like, uh. Samuel.

Now I spell out my meditation. (See, I've been doing my homework)

If there's anything the Bible does outstandingly, it is the imagery presented and how it challenges all conventions of the world, even today's. Oh what book dares to claim such greatness? Only one of God's Word.

Knowing that in the time of my absence in camp (and much meditation, nursing and slacking thereafter), the Poly mates have been running around in their little lives, it almost seems amusing to me. It appears to me that I'm the only one standing so still. If some were in my shoes, they'd make me get off my ass to busy myself with something, if anything at all. Or sleep for more than half the day away.

In a position where one would kneel at the feet of Jesus to listen, and honestly, it's rather enjoyable. The conflict of Martha and Mary anyone?

It's the pace of the world, or at least this part of the world, to keep running and relaxing comes only once in a while. No wonder so many of us lose ourselves in all that activity. What is the point of forgetting, then remembering, wiping a stray tear away, then back to the process of forgetting until it all simmers to a cool and the forgotten.

God is weird. I just don't get Him at times. He slows me down in a time when everyone's rushing to somewhere. The next meeting, getting projects done, studying, Singapore Idol (if you're lucky), SPX (which happened when I was at camp), camps, National Day, volunteer work, CASS, ccas, and side projects. Go go go on our feet. I've never slowed down like this before.

It's as if there's a million and one things I ought to be doing (the culture gets to you), but He's telling me that He will provide and there will be a time for all that, and time happens to be a provision that will be aplenty if He wills it.

I can't help but feel I'm being tuned to seek first the Word of God before doing anything. No more rash descisions. No point getting frustrated with things you have to decide on. Patience, makes me think of how much of this I've lacked. Running amok in the wrong direction didn't get my anywhere, well, duh.

His Word is harder than diamond, yet more flexible than gum. Laws written in His best interest for us.

Haha, I've received my due punishment for wilfulness and it is now a time of training. Training to listen (that means shutting up) and communicating with God to make the best possible descisions for my life. Thanks for putting me out of my misery. So much energy gone to naught is an upsetting thought anyway.

In my belief, His Word is infallible. Think of it as insurance beyond all policies, one that would come to fear, obey, respect, love and understand. Tis' no time to argue with the non-believers. That'll be addressed sooner or later.

Sometimes, people turn away from the Word because at the end of the day, they've got no time for the Lord, or they're just afraid to surrender whatever they've made of their life to something intangible.

Understandable. I persecute no one.

Okay back to the topic. Thinking of Mary and Martha, I suppose I needed to be kicked out of the Martha mode. Eventually it just got too tiring anyway. Mary was a servant of God the way it was supposed to be. Spiritually, it's a matter of who our master is, innit?

Again maybe that's why. Non-believers have been stripped of trust, simply because it is in a way, a practical form of survival instinct in play. Just goes to show I don't talk without understanding what it's like.

As for who the true master is, everyone's lives are written down already. This line is open to interpretation. There's more to this sentence than meets the eye, more than what our minds can already perceive.

I won't ever want another master. No addictions for me. Maybe that's why a part of me spoke out so strongly against a friend wanting alcohol to cope with a crisis. I never understood why, and part of me took it as a having a personal thing against that, something that your conscience cannot allow. Might've made me sound like a prude, but my mind is made up. I now know why.

The seed was planted when I was 7 (after which another one had to be planted, or was it the same?) Unknowingly, I'd opened up myself and everything I didn't understand to the Lord. Kids do the darndest things.

Who would've known. 9 years would pass and for some reason, I'd never go far beyond where my conscience would allow...

Sit at His feet today. Let wisdom beyond all the comprehension you've been in touch with bless you.

If you're reading this today and made it this far, you've got some kickass attention span to listen to such meditation.

identity-finder, half-thinker, thought-translater, life-pacer, adversary-fighter, grown-wiser, subtle-humour, nail-biter, indulgent-appreciator, pragmatic-dreamer, irony-murdered, unglamourous-puss, rocket-bunny

october 1st, sixteen, libran, singapore, tutor, christian, student, daughter, sister, friend, writer, artist, teenager, life, love

corny in a paradigm where sense and non sequiturs go together, taking it in like vanilla ice cream on a banana split, or sand on a boot. whichever goes.

Adelina Anjelica Cassandra Clarissa Daniel Esther E-von Geraldine Hairil HongWei Huiyi Jasmin Jasmine Jay Joseph Kenneth Marlyna Mythili Nadrah Samuel Sharon Sisi Shawn Stephanie Szeyuan Tivona YongQuan SHAKIRA Bare Feet JSS ELDDS

intricate-archiver

credit-or